A range of T-Shirts inspired by a recent trip to Berlin. This and many more designs available from our shop
Berlin: March 2009
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Squid stuffed with prawns
“I’m sitting at this table called love, staring down at the irony of life. How come we’ve reached this fork in the road, and yet it cuts like a knife”*
WIN a Pair of Tickets to ‘Taste of London’!!! (CLOSED)
Yumblog in association with ‘Taste of London’ is offering you the chance to win a pair of tickets to the world’s greatest restaurant festival. All you have to do is simply send us hilarious puns which aptly combine ‘food’ with ‘London’. Huh? For example how about ‘Hot Cross Barnes’, ‘Beef Shadwellington’, ‘Rhubarbican’ or possibly ‘Lobster Thermidalston’? Get the idea? We’ve …
Kids and water, they love it…
Rolf tells how it is. This and many more designs available from our shop
be smart …be safe
“You must be out of your tiny little minds” if you don’t buy this T-Shirt. This and many more designs available from our shop
Splink
First find a Safe place to cross. Stand on the Pavement near the kerb. Look all around for traffic, and listen. If traffic is coming, then let it pass. When there is No traffic near, walk straight across the road. Keep looking and listening for traffic while you cross. SPLINK! This and many more designs available from our shop
Smoked Mackerel Pâté
This is an easy-to-make, rich-and-tasty treat which merits a place alongside the holy trinity of party dips – houmus, taramasalata and guacamole.
Brussels Sprout & Caramelised Onion Soup
I didn’t have high hopes for this soup when I started it, mainly because it contains little more than the humble sprout and onion. However, it turned out to be quite a clever ‘everyday’ soup and would be an ideal way to use up any sprouts you might have knocking around from Christmas. It’s a Sophie Grigson recipe, so clip …
Paccheri with Anchovies, Capers, Olives (& Raisins)
I came across this recipe in Saturday’s Telegraph magazine (not mine you understand). I was drawn to it because not only does it include a novelty pasta and three favoured salty ingredients (anchovies, olives and capers) but it also bizarrely contains a smattering of raisins. Would this be (as Gregg and John often say) one ingredient too many? Would it …
Kwik White Bread
‘Eating lots of white bread raises the risk of a cancer that kills thousands of Britons every year … those who eat five slices a day are almost twice as likely to develop the most common form of kidney cancer compared to those who have one and a half slices.’… or so says that putrid voicepiece of everything that is …
A Weekend in Brugge
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Culture: De Halve Maanâ Brewery, Brugge
Culture: Brugge Chip Museum
Escalivada
There are scurrilous allegations in today’s papers that Yumblog NEVER signed for Glasgow Rovers and NEVER played a first team game for them – despite saying so repeatedly on TV, radio and in print. Yumblog is sticking with the porkies told in our autobiography ‘Yumble Pie’ that we were in fact the Glasgow giants’ star player and gloriously took them …
Baked Feta Parcel
Yet more allegations that Yumblog, 42, has been having a sordid (and utterly predictable) affair with a desperate publicity-seeking blonde slapper, 37. This is of course untrue, and to prove our innocence we bribed bought Mrs Yumblog, 33, a fucking massive diamond ring from fucking Theo Fennell!
Patatas Bravas
Rumours abound that Yumblog Holdings has breached its banking covenants (whatever that means) and that perhaps the Yumblog franchise is not the cash cow it once used to be. We would like to rigorously refute these allegations and point out that all of our ventures (including Yumblog at Claridges, Yum in Grosvenor Square, Ad Nauseyum on Royal Hospital Road, J.D. …
Linguine with Pesto and New Potatoes
A double hit of carbs here – like a chip butty – only posher – innit.
A Sunday Lunch in Clapham
Escalopes of Salmon with Champagne & Chive Sauce
This was something a little bit special for Valentine’s Day courtesy of Rick Stein.
The second issue of Yumie Magazine is out now
Your second helping of Yumie Magazine is now available from just the one outlet, making it reasonably difficult to get hold of but all the more exclusive for it, after all exclusivity is what Yumie is all about. It isn’t? Oh. Anyway this edition is full to the brim with meaty nourishment to keep your coat lovely and shiny. Yumie’s …
MasterChef Winner
Congratulations Matt (with one ‘T’)
Lemon Dhal Soup
It’s MasterChef final week, yeah. Such a shame that the nice Greek guy was dumped last Thursday as he was our favourite, we actively liked him. Now it’s down to the young one, the posh one and the beardy baldy cry baby one who sounds like Tony Blair. The posho is bound to win, but he is unfortunately a tad …
Cauliflower & Cheddar Soup
… or cauliflower cheese in liquid form. A perfect winter warmer for the snowiest (and therefore the most exciting) day in 18 years.
Mozzarella
Ok, pay attention. Blogger D’s archaeologist sister (from hereonin known as ‘Sherdkicker T’) came to Yumblog Towers for dinner. She brought along her ‘friend’ who is also an archaeologist and so for continuity should be known as ‘Sherdkicker J-P’. However Sherdkicker J-P is a handsomely moustached Frenchman and so perhaps needs to be translated as ‘Pulseur de poterie J-P’. ‘PdP …
Lentil-stuffed Flatbreads
Another recipe purloined from Dan ‘Pour some sugar on me’ Lepard, which was in turn of other provenance, but such is cooking, dishes are passed from one to another and in doing so they evolve. Talking of Darwin, he was 200 the other day you know and Google honoured this on their homepage. I wonder how many deluded creationists boiled …
Nut Roast
Few words when paired together drain the soul of joy quite as much as the foreboding coupling of nut + roast. Obviously there’s the odious David + Cameron or the thoroughly depressing Cold + Play, but these are both far too loathsome to be mentioned in this little corner of the blogosphere. Nut Roast conjures up the image of a …
Onion Soup
Yumblog is now being swamped with spam. So to all those spammers trying to flog us Arcoxia, Atarax, Augmentin, Buspirone, Cardizem, Celebrex and a whole alphabet of other ‘meds’ – fuck off. To the spammers who think we’re so dull-witted we’d publish their comments because they write a generic ‘I completely agree’ – fuck off. To the spammers who have …
MasterChef
Choose between John and Gregg with their catchphrases “Whoever wins, it will change their life!” and “Cooking doesn’t get tougher than this!” or Gregg on his own saying “Beefy, beefy mushrooms” This and many more designs available from our shop
Fisherman’s Soup with Aioli Toast
I came across this Mitch Tonks recipe on the excellent BBC ‘Get Cooking‘ website. If this dish is anything to go by, fishermen eat exceedingly well.
‘Cooking Doesn’t Get Tougher Than This!’ Apron
This is the first in what will no doubt be an endless stream of ‘MasterChef’ inspired cooking aprons, and is yours for a modest £18.90. Buy now or wait until we’ve come up with some better ideas. Available in a range of fresh and modern colours.
Creationism
“I’ve started to drift towards a belief in God, creationism and intelligent design. When I look at something as complete and intricate and detailed as Professor Dawkins I think, ‘Surely that can’t just have happened by chance’.” A quote from the comedy genius Stewart Lee. This and many more designs available from our shop
Semolina-crust pain de mie
This Saturday I had the urge to spend all day in the kitchen and there is no better way of achieving this than embarking on one of Dan Lepard‘s more involved and elaborate recipes. This loaf takes the best part of a day to create and requires the making of two separate doughs – one for the inside and one …
Sunday (Birthday) Lunch at L’Oasis
A L’Oasis in the desert of KFC and Wetherspoon hell that is the Mile End Road. RIP
Yuckblog 8: Drei Deutsche Imbisse
Like a dog returning to its vomit, here we are once again preparing three unappetising platefuls of instant pasta for this, our eighth yuckblog taste test. Thus far much of what we have tried has been of such a lamentable quality it can barely be described as ‘food’, so this time we have travelled further afield and purchased our specimens …
Honeyed Tomato Soup
Phwaaar! Great flavour combinations. You’ve got the sweetness of the tomatoes, then an explosion of fragrant basil, finishing with the floral kiss of honey. Yes, MASTERCHEF!! has returned to our screens. Actually this is a delicious and unusual dish. If you can only summon the enthusiasm to cook one thing this year, make sure it is this soup. “Agony and …
Spicy Tomato Ketchup
‘A true taste of Mediterranean tomatoes to bring a touch of sunshine to British fish and chips. It’s the ultimate sauce to enhance your haddock or perk up your pollock’. Not my words you understand, but those of Jme (Champion of the people) Oliver describing his ‘Real Tomato Ketchup’ which he is flogging on his website for an impressive £3.50 …
Rosti (potato pancake)
This recipe is for my dad who misses the rostis my mum used to make but has so far been unsuccessful in his attempts to recreate them. There are many ways to rosti a potato – purists would have you boil them first and leave to rest overnight before peeling and grating; others would urge you to add egg or …
Hund T-Shirt
If you’re fond of dogs and like t-shirts, then you’ll love this dog t-shirt. Go on, consume and make your life worthwile. Happiness is a click away. Many more designs available from our shop
Fish Fingers
OK, so it looks as if this particular fish had its fingers variously crushed in a freak piscine industrial accident, but they are tasty nevertheless. Tastier than Cap’n Birdseye’s even.