Carp

If like me two weeks ago, you have never tasted carp and you think it would be interesting to give it a go, my advice to you is please don’t bother. Along with voting Tory, ‘The Vicar of Dibley’ and felching, it is an experience best avoided.

There is a reason why carp is an anagram of crap

As we were spending Christmas in Berlin we thought it would be a good idea to have a traditional German Christmas Eve meal of carp. A little research on the Information Super Highway led to a recipe of poached carp with a sour cream sauce.

The sauce was good, but the carp had a feathery appearance similar to tripe, and tasted of … well nothing much really. Possibly a very slight fishy taste with subtle undertones of estuary mud.

Preparation time: 0 minutes
Cooking time: Don’t bother
Skill level: Very easy
Make: Something else

Verdict: Perhaps carp is like turkey – something you traditionally only eat at Christmas and no other time of the year because it’s not actually that good.

Drink: Twas the night before christmas, so cava followed by plenty of good red wine.

Entertainment: The sound of people politely scraping unwanted carp to the sides of their plates.

Co-blogger coda: Carp is the second most disgusting thing I’ve ever eaten, the first most disgusting being veal cheek which I rather foolishly tried some years ago when in rural France. Like carp I’d been told it was a much loved traditional dish. Actually I did manage the whole cheek despite it having the texture and indeed look of wet grey sand. It was of course eaten mostly to prove I wasn’t a big wuss, but it was eaten with my nose blocked to avoid the taste. The texture of carp is like eating the gill side of a wet mushroom, all fanned out, with a hint of fish, but really I promise you, only a hint. Luckily I’d been up since 3.30 thanks to fog/BA so a few glasses of wine meant I really didn’t care about leaving most of it on my plate. Nice sauce though.