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Happy Easter from Yumblog

Regular reader(s) will probably be aware that every year at this time we here at Yumblog experience a visitation from the son of God ‘His Royal Highness Jesus H Christ’ in the form of the appearance of his divine fizzog on various household items. Imagine how delighted we were this Easter when the King of Glory deigned to make his …

Happy Easter from Yumblog

Regular reader(s) will probably be aware that  every year at this time we here at yumblog experience a visitation from the son of God ‘His Royal Highness Jesus H Christ’ in the form of the appearance of his princely fizzog on various domestic items. Imagine how shocked we were when this Easter it wasn’t the apparition of the King of Glory that …

Observer Food Monthly Awards 2011

Yumblog has won ‘Best Food Blog‘ for an unprecedented tenth year in a row! (Surely some mistake – Ed) So thank you to the thousands of kind and generous readers who voted for us in this year’s Observer Food Monthly Awards. Thanks also to OFM’s panel of judges who singled us out for our extraordinary talent, enthusiasm and vision … …

We have moved…

…to West Yorkshire. Yumblog have up sticks, waved goodbye to the chicken box and red spit paved streets of Bethnal Green and headed north to the Incredible Edible blooming market town of Todmorden. Set on the Pennine waterway in the heart of Calderdale, Tod (as we locals call it) has it’s own brewery, cheese maker, community vegetable beds and herb …

Press Release

Yumtech Technology Solutions are proud to announce that since the spectacular success of its trial on Simon Hopkinson’s ‘The Good Cook’, all future Yumblog postings will now feature this convenient ‘Quick Response’ code. Simply touch your QR enabled Android smartphone* to the screen and instantly receive the missing parts of the recipe we couldn’t be bothered to type up, a …

Latest Yumie magazine hits the newsagents

Hi guys, hot off the press, the latest issue of Yumie magazine hits the newsagents’ shelves today. However, as the covershot is a photograph of an unmarried man casually tossing a salad, we feel we are beholden to public decency to place it behind our Family Shield™. Boom! And THAT ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, is called satire. (WARNING! …

Celebrity Masterchef

Don’t forget, 20:00, tomorrow, for the next 128 weeks. The first crop of celebrities are: Neil Stuke (Game On/The Bill), Tessa Sanderson (Javelin Gold Medal/The Bill), Richard Farleigh (Dragons Den/The Bill), Alex Fletcher (Brookside/The Bill) and Nihal Arthanayake (Radio One/The Bill) Next: Colin Jackson (5 ft 11½ in), Tricia Penrose (From Heartbeat to a fitness video via a failed music …

Yumblog Junior

We here at Yumblog would like to announce the addition to our team of Yumblog Junior, who arrived last Wednesday weighing in at an impressive 9lb 12oz. Normal Yumblogging will resume soon and we promise no cutesy baby anecdotes or amusing tales of parenthood.* * probably

Congratulations Dhruv

Congratulations to NuDadDhruv for winning last nights MasterChef. He and the rest of the show will be greatly missed here at Yumblog Towers, although on the plus side we’ll no longer have to watch the endlessly repeated clip of the Tower of London toff coyly complaining “I think if I hadn’t been told it was a pigs ear I might …

Happy Easter from yumblog

Regular readers may recall that last year the face of our Lord Jesus H Christ miraculously appeared on a piece of toast. Well imagine our surprise when exactly a year to the day, the very same holy fizzog materialised on the piece of muslin we were using to cover our Hot Cross Bun dough. We immediately contacted experts at the …

Sophie Dahl Cocktail Shaker

Have you been watching the new Sophie Dahl cookery show? Isn’t it utterly brilliant! I think we can all agree it’s the very embodiment of the Reithian axiom to educate, inform and entertain and the BBC should be rightly proud of itself*. Who needs 6Music if the money saved by its butchery can go to make edifying programmes such as …

Nothing to do with food: Save 6Music

Blogger-D’s comment on Guardian Online I’m guessing that the amount of publicity given to 6Music these past few days must have done quite a bit to their listenership, I hope it has. Thompson and his fellow idiots should check out the figures and listen to their audience of proper music lovers. Does the BBC not exist to provide for the …

Double Yolker

Following on from this week’s earth shattering news of a woman who found six double yolkers* in a single box of eggs, imagine our surprise and delight when we cracked open an egg this morning and found not just a double yolk, but a double yolk bearing the dual fizzogs of cheeky TV light entertainers Ant and Dec. Obviously we …

McTory Burger Launch

Ever willing to jump on any faddish bandwagon which happens to be passing his £1.5 million North Kensington home, and eager to emulate the grubby and cynical dealings of Silvio Berlusconi, David Cameron today announced the launch of the McTory burger. Included in the range is the McBullingdon (Two over-privileged 1/2lb brandy fuelled patties made from a smug blend of …

British Children’s Packed Lunch Shock

I was shocked to read that British children’s packed lunches are not meeting the nutritional standards that have been set for their classmates on school meals. A typical school child’s packed lunch consists of sugary snacks, knives,  meow meow, happy slapping, chlamydia, Asbo’s and Monster Munch it was revealed in today’s Daily Mail. This nutritional outrage is in stark contrast …

Christmas Yumie Magazine now available

Hi guys. Hot off the mustard* the new issue of Yumie Magazine is chock-a-block full of exciting colourful Christmas ideas to make your humble monochrome existence less shabby, bleak, and let’s be honest, pointless. Look on with slack-jawed envy as we honour you with a glimpse into the kaleidoscopic sumptuous magnificence that is a Christmas here at Yumblog Towers. Our …

Salty Salty lick Lick

Hi Guys, is Jamie Oliver’s Spicy Olive Garlic & Tomato Pasta Sauce not salty enough for you? Why not try the Yumblog strawberry flavoured salt lick – It’s guaranteed to get your blood boiling! Only £12.99 from all good branches of Cost Cutter. Great sprinkled on chips!

The Rise of the Idiots

Fwd: Underground food and drink festival, E8 Hi R (a) It costs £40 (b) It involves booze (c) It is pitching itself as so intolerably cool I can almost feel the moustaches Obviously we won’t be able to call ourselves cutting edge any more, never mind. D xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx