Our constructed Colcannon soup can be found here.

Preparation time: 5-10 minutes
Cooking time: about 30 minutes
Skill level: so easy you should NEVER buy commercially made soup*
Serves: 2

Ingredients

For the soup part

• potato – peeled and diced – 450g
• onion – finely chopped – 120g
• butter – 50g
• vegetable stock – 1 litre
• full fat milk – 100ml
• fresh parsley – finely chopped – 1-2tbsp
• s & p

For the cabbage part

• cabbage (white or savoy) – 450g
• butter – 40g
• s & p

To make the soup, melt the butter in a large heavy pan, then add the potato and onion. Stir to coat everything in butter and season with salt and pepper.

Cover and sweat over a low heat for 5 minutes.

Add the stock, turn up the heat and simmer for 10-15 minutes until the potato is soft.

Liquidise with a hand blender and return to the heat.

Add the parsley and milk and season to taste – be generous with the pepper.

Meanwhile shred the cabbage very thinly – removing outer leaves and stalk.

Pour 3 tbsp of water into a large saucepan and add half the butter (20g) and a pinch of salt.

Put on the heat and when the butter has melted add the cabbage and toss everything together.

Cover with a lid and cook for a few minutes until the cabbage has softened but still has a little bite.

Add the remaining butter and season with salt and pepper.

To serve, pile the cabbage in the centre of a soup bowl and pour the soup around.

Verdict: This deconstructed version ensures the cabbage still has a bit if bite. Warming, comforting and as Gregg Wallace might well say ‘Like a big buttery smack on the lips’.

Drink: A mug of no nonsense Yorkshire Gold. ‘Let’s have a proper brew’

Entertainment: The ever brilliant Radcliffe and Maconie.

*The exception being Heinz tomato soup when poorly or hungover.

Preparation time: 10 minutes plus 30 minutes soaking
Cooking time: 35 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• mushrooms (we used portabello from our bargain box) – roughly chopped – 800g
• dried porcini – reconstituted (retain the soaking water) – small handful
• 2 large shallots (or 1 posh onion) – finely chopped
• 2 cloves of garlic – finely chopped
• butter – 50g
• vegetable stock – 800ml
• milk – 400ml
• olive oil
• s and p
• double cream, crème fraiche or yoghurt – to serve
• juice and zest of half a lemon – to serve

Start by soaking your porcini in just warm water for at least 30 minutes. Strain the soaking water through a sieve lined with kitchen paper and set aside. Roughly chop the porcini and also set aside.

In a large heavy-bottomed pan, sweat the shallots (or onion) and garlic in the butter until soft (but not coloured).

Add the chopped mushrooms and continue to sweat down until they are soft.

Add the porcini, soaking water, stock and milk and simmer uncovered for about 20 minutes.

Here at Yumblog we pride ourselves on offering you, dear reader, choice. So at this stage you have three options depending on your fancy. You can either liquidise half the soup and return it to the pan for a rough texture, liquidise all of the soup for a smoother texture, or liquidise all the soup and then pass through a sieve for a texture smoother than Smooth Jack McSmooth lounging in a velvet smoking jacket.

Which ever you choose, return the soup to the pan, bring back up to heat, taste and season with salt and black pepper.

Finally, mix together the lemon juice and zest with a sprinkling of salt and a twist of pepper.

Serve the soup with a blob of cream (or crème fraiche or yoghurt) and a splash of the lemon mixture.

Verdict: This, like most mushroom-heavy recipes, is necessarily brown and therefore not particularly pretty, and so is probably a dish to cook for yourself rather than serve up to guests (or Michelle Roux Jr) as the centre-piece of a swanky dinner party. However, don’t be put off by its tawny appearance, as this is a very tasty soup indeed.

Drink: A strong mug of lunchtime tea. It must be something to do with the water but tea definitely brews stronger up north.

Entertainment: Watching the constant parade of dogs (and their walkers) outside our window.

* Damp was his profession, not his demeanour.

Preparation time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 35 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• 1 head of celery – chopped – about 700g (keep any leaves for a garnish)
• 1 largish onion – finely chopped
• 1 clove of garlic – finely chopped
• a small bunch of parsley – finely chopped
• vegetable stock – 1 litre
• single cream – 100ml (you can also use crème fraiche or full-fat milk)
• olive oil
• nutmeg – a good pinch
• s and p

Pour some oil into a large heavy-bottomed saucepan and add the celery, onion and garlic.

Sweat over a gentle heat for about 15 minutes until the vegetables are soft but not coloured.

Add the stock, parsley and nutmeg along with a generous twist of black pepper.

Simmer for about 15 minutes.

Pour into a liquidiser and blitz until smooth.

Pass though a sieve back into the saucepan. Use the back of a ladle to squash as much liquid (and flavour) out of the fibre.

Pour in the cream and bring back to temperature.

Serve with an extra drizzle of cream and a sprinkling of chopped celery leaves.

Verdict: Celery is usually just a secondary player in many soups, so it’s nice to put it front of stage for once… and it doesn’t disappoint. In fact it shines… a clean, smooth, surprisingly sophisticated soup.

Drink: N/A at lunchtime.

Entertainment: Radcliffe and Maconie

Preparation time: 15 minutes
Cooking time: 20 – 30 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 4

Ingredients

• stale white bread – good stuff, not Mother’s Pride – 50g
• 2 large red peppers
• very ripe tomatoes – skinned – 1kg
• 1 cucumber
• 3 cloves of garlic – crushed
• extra virgin olive oil – 150ml
• red wine or sherry vinegar – 4 tbsp
• salt

For the garnish

• croutons – white bread – cut into small squares and fried in olive oil
• green pepper – cut into a small dice
• cucumber – cut into a small dice
• spring onions – finely chopped

Preheat your oven to 220c (gas 7)

Put the red peppers on a baking sheet and roast in the oven for 20-30 minutes until the skin is black and blistered. (You’ll need to turn them a few times to ensure an even roasting)

Place in a plastic bag (or bowl covered in clingfilm) and leave to sweat until cool enough to handle.

Remove the stalk, seeds and skin, roughly chop and set aside (be sure to keep any juice as this all adds to the flavour).

Meanwhile, pour some water over the stale bread and set aside for half an hour to soak.

Quarter the skinned tomatoes and scoop out the seeds into a sieve over a bowl. Squash down on the seeds with the back of a ladle to extract as much of the juice as you can.

Peel the cucumber, cut in half lengthways and scoop out the seeds with a teaspoon (discard seeds) and roughly chop.

Put the tomatoes, their juice, roasted peppers, chopped cucumber, soaked bread, crushed garlic, vinegar, olive oil and 1½ teaspoons of salt into a liquidizer and blend until smooth. YOU MAY HAVE TO DO THIS IN 2 BATCHES, depending on the capacity of your liquidizer.

Thin with a little cold water if necessary (we didn’t), check and adjust the seasoning, pour into a serving bowl and place in the fridge for at least 2 hours.

Serve with the garnishes and a further drizzle of olive oil.

Verdict: Fandabbydozy. Liquid summer. A classic gazpachio.

Drink: Fandabbyboozy. A few Cornish ales on the grass outside The Palm Tree.

Entertainment: Back home in time for ‘Dad’s Army’.

Don’t tell Social Services – Yumblog Junior downs a pint in 8.75 seconds

This soup kicked off the four courses and is a variation (and dare I say improvement) on a Valentine Warner recipe from the highly recommended ‘What to Eat Now: Spring and Summer’.

Preparation time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 20 – 25 minutes
Skill level: straightforward if a little faffy for a soup
Serves: 4 as a starter

Ingredients

• 1 large shallot – finely dices
• 1 large cucumber
• fresh podded garden peas – 220g (keep the pods)
• 1 large round lettuce
• butter – 25g
• 2 garlic clove – crushed and chopped
• nutmeg – ¼ tsp or a good grating
• vegetable stock – 400ml
• lemon juice – squeeze
• a handful of cooked prawns
• créme fraîche – 4tbsp
• salt & pepper

Pod the peas.

Next put the pea pods into a saucepan along with the stock, bring to the boil and simmer for 5-8 minutes until the pods are tender.

Remove from the heat and when cool enough to handle, pour into a liquidiser.

Liquidise thoroughly and then pass through a sieve into a bowl. Use the back of a ladle to force as much of the liquid out of the pulp. Set aside.

Melt the butter in a medium-sized saucepan and add the chopped shallot and garlic. Cook for about 8 minutes or until translucent but not coloured.

Peel the cucumber, cut in half  lengthways and scoop out (and discard) the seeds. Roughly chop and add to the pan along with the nutmeg and some generous seasoning.

Cook over a medium heat for a further 3-4 minutes until soft and translucent.

Add the peas and the sieved pea pod/stock mixture, cover and simmer gently for 7 or so minutes until the peas are tender. Take care not to overcook.

Remove from the heat and when cool enough to handle, pour into a liquidiser and blitz thoroughly until smooth.

Leave in the liquidiser to cool.

Meanwhile separate the lettuce leaves from the stalk, keeping the stalk as this will add to the flavour (just trim off any brown).

Rinse the leaves and stalk thoroughly in a sieve, drain and roughly chop.

When the soup is cool, add the lettuce and stalk and liquidise until smooth – you’ll probably have to do this in stages as the lettuce is quite bulky.

Add a squeeze of lemon juice, taste and adjust the seasoning.

Pass through a fine sieve into a suitable container and chill in the fridge.

Remove from the fridge and hour before serving as you don’t want it so cold you lose the flavour. Stir in the créme fraîche, taste and adjust the seasoning if necessary.

Ladel into the serving bowls and float on a few prawns.

Serve and enjoy.

Verdict: Liquid summer. The use of the pea pods was my audacious ‘improvement’ and I feel it added considerably to the depth of peaness in this soup. The prawns are not essential, however as well as being pretty they also add nice little sweet nuggets of fishiness to the whole experience.

Drink: A good bottle of red from the Frenchman, a not so good bottle of white from the Englishman.

Entertainment: Talk of Rome, Paris and Todmorden.

Yumblog Junior discovers cherries

Preparation time: 15 minutes
Cooking time: 1 hour 20 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 3 – 4

Ingredients

• 1 onion – finely chopped
• 1 carrot – finely chopped
• 1 celery stalk – finely chopped
• 1 garlic clove – finely chopped
• puy lentils – 250g
• butternut squash – peeled and cut into wedges – 250g
• 2 sprigs of rosemary (optional)
• 1 tin of chopped Italian tomatoes – 400g
• half a preserved lemon – rinsed, flesh discarded, rind thinly sliced
• harissa – 2 tsp (or to taste)
• 2 bay leaves
• tomato puree (or ketchup) – 1tbsp
• lemon juice – squeeze
• olive oil – good slug
• butter – knob
• s & p
• PLUS Greek yoghurt and coriander to serve

“You puny Earthlings are no match for me!”

Preheat your oven to 200C/gas mark 6.

Place the butternut squash on a baking tray, scatter with rosemary and drizzle with olive oil.

Roast in the oven until soft and golden (about 30 minutes). Remove and discard the rosemary. Set aside.

Meanwhile, heat some olive oil and butter in a large heavy bottomed saucepan over a medium heat. Add the onion and saute (stirring occasionally) until soft and golden (8-10 minutes).

Then add the carrot, celery and garlic and continue cooking until soft and golden (8-10 minutes).

Next add the lentils, bay leaves and 1 litre of water. Bring to the boil and simmer gently for 20 minutes.

Add the roasted butternut squash, chopped tomatoes and tomato puree, season with salt and pepper and simmer until the lentils are very tender (20-30 minutes).

Add the preserved lemon, a handful of chopped coriander and harissa to taste and cook for a further 10 minutes.

Squeeze in a little lemon juice, taste and adjust the seasoning.

Serve immediately with a blob of yoghurt and an extra sprinkling of coriander.

You might need some bread to mop the plate.

Verdict: A scrumptiously thick and hearty beast packed with lentil earthiness, chilli heat and lemon zestiness. Please don’t skip the yoghurt and coriander as they are essential components of this dish.

Drink: A Wa’ro red.

Entertainment: How about a bit of genius from Ian Dury:

The inverted commas are there because as you can see from the photo, it is more of a schlem than a soup.

Preparation time: 15 minutes

Cooking time: 1 hour 15 minutes

Skill level: easy

Serves: 2

Ingredients

• 1 small onion – chopped
• 1 red pepper – deseeded – finely sliced
• 2 garlic cloves – thinly sliced
• 1 chilli – finely chopped
• 1 tin of quality chopped tomatoes – 400g
• water – tap – 350ml
• caster sugar – 1tsp
• extra-virgin olive oil – a good slug (about 25 ml)
• smoked sweet paprika – 1tsp
• cumin – ½ tsp
• fresh parsley – finely chopped – 2 tbsp
• 2 free range eggs
• s & p

Pour the oil into a saucepan and place over a medium heat.

Add the onion and a pinch of salt and sauté until soft and translucent (5-7 minutes).

Add the pepper, chilli and garlic, reduce the heat, cover and cook, stirring frequently, until the mixture has the consistency of jam (35-40 minutes).

Stir in the tomato and water and simmer until mixture has a thick soup consistency (20-25 minutes).

Add sugar, cumin, paprika.

Mix together, taste and season with salt and pepper.

Crack the eggs, one at a time, onto a saucer and gently slide into the tomato mixture.

Cover and simmer gently until cooked to your liking (3 minutes for soft yolks, or 5-6 minutes for well-done).

Ladle into warm bowls and sprinkle with a little extra paprika (optional).

Serve with crusty bread.

Verdict: A tasty and spicy start to the weekend. It’s all about the slow cooking, so make sure you get up in time.

Drink: A strong K4e with condensed milk.

Entertainment: Planning the rest of the weekend meals.

Yumblog Junior plays safely within the containment field.

* UK and Ireland only. Terms and conditions apply.

This was never going to be a pretty dish.

Preparation time: 45 minutes plus OVERNIGHT SOAKING
Cooking time: 40 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2 – 4 depending on level of greed

Ingredients

For the soup

• vegetable stock – 1.5 litres
• pearl barley – 100g
• finely grated rind of 1 lemon
• saffron – pinch
• Greek yoghurt – 500g
• cornflour – 2 tsp
• 1 free range egg – lightly beaten

For the kofta

• dried chickpeas – 125g
• bicarb of soda – ½ tsp
• 1 onion – finely chopped
• ground turmeric – 2 tsp
• smoked paprika – 2 tsp
• ground cumin – 2 tsp
• coriander and/or flat-leaf parsley – finely chopped – big handful
• fresh mint – finely chopped – small handful
• tomato purée – squirt
• olive oil
• s & p

Start by soaking the chickpeas overnight in 2 litres of cold water with added bicarb of soda.

The next day boil them up for about 20 minutes until tender, drain and set aside to cool.

Preheat the oven to 200C/gas mark 6.

When cool, put the chickpeas in a food processor with the onion and process to a fairly fine paste.

Scoop out into a large mixing bowl, add the herbs, spices and tomato purée and stir to combine. Season to taste.

Lube your hands up with some olive oil and then roll the kofta mix into walnut-sized balls.

Place on a baking tray lined with lightly oiled baking paper and place in the oven for about 20 minutes or until pleasantly golden brown (turn occasionally to avoid hot spots).

Meanwhile make the soup…

Bring the stock to a boil over medium heat, add barley, lemon rind and saffron and simmer until barley is tender (20-25 minutes).

As this is happening, pour the yoghurt into a large bowl along with the beaten egg and mix until smooth.

Mix the cornflour with 50ml of cold water to form a smooth paste and then add to the yoghurt.

Add 100ml of the barley stock to the yoghurt mixture and whisk to combine.

Now add the yoghurt mixture to the barley stock, place on a low heat for 4-5 minutes and bring to a gentle simmer, stirring continuously … take care NOT to boil.

Season to taste.

To serve, place some koftas in the bottom of warmed soup bowls and pour over the soup. Drizzle with olive oil if the mood takes you.

Prepare yourself for strangeness …

Verdict: Wow, this is the weirdest soup I’ve ever had … a sort of savoury lassi with the consistancy of tapioca … unsual but pretty darn tasty, and perfectly accompanied by the spicy (and fairly hot) koftas. If you are put off by the tapiocosity of this dish, try substituting the pearl barley with rice. Weird.

Drink: A crafty monday night bottle of Rosé.

Entertainment: Still working our way through the fifth season of ‘Homocide: Life on the Streets’.

Yumblog Junior is left unattended in a pub garden with only a packet of Swan Vestas to play with.

A quarter of the way into our sack of onions, time to try another soup…

Featuring as it does cider and Stilton,
this could probably be called an English Onion Soup.

Preparation time: 20 minutes
Cooking time: 1½ hours
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2 as a main, 4 as a starter/snack

Ingredients

• 5 medium sized onions – thinly sliced – about 800g
• butter – a very generous sized knob (snigger)
• vegetable stock – 900ml
• dry cider – 250ml
• plain flour – 1½ tbsp
• the chopped leaves from a few sprigs of thyme
• extra virgin olive oil – a glug
• double cream – 2 tbsp
• Stilton – 80g
• s & p

Heat some olive oil in a thick-bottomed pan and gently cook the onions and thyme for about 10 minutes until they are soft but not coloured (keep the pan covered with a lid but remember to stir from time to time).

Add the butter and flour and stir over a low heat for a minute or so.

Slowly pour in the cider and vegetable stock, stirring constantly.

Season with salt and pepper.

Bring to the boil and simmer for 1 hour.

Add the cream, check/adjust the seasoning,  and as soon as the soup is back to the boil it is ready to eat.

Cut/crumble the Stilton into small pieces.

To serve, pour into serving dishes and scatter with Stilton.

Verdict: A rich warming soup …. the astringency of the cheese complements the sweetness of the onions perfectly.

Drink: H2O and K4E.

Entertainment: Watching Yumblog Junior playing on her bouncy thing.

Around our way virtually every shop sells these 4kg sacks of onions for a very reasonable £2, so we thought we’d buy one and see if we could eat the entire contents in sufficiently varied ways that we didn’t slump into an Allium ennui induced coma. This onion soup is French(ish) because it is made without the traditional beef or dark chicken stock, and vegetarian(ish) because you’d have to shop around to find a suitable rennet-free cheese.

> Yumblog Junior playing with cellophane.

Before starting this soup, please note that it takes at least 4 hours to make.

Preparation time: 30 minutes
Cooking time: 4 hours
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2 as a main, 4 as a starter/snack

Ingredients

• 8-12 onions – thinly sliced – 1 kg
• butter – 100g
• vegetable stock – 2 litres
• a generous glass of dry white wine
• brandy – 2 tbsp
• plain flour – 1½ tsp
• a few sprigs of thyme
• red wine vinegar (or sherry) – 1tsp
• salt and pepper
• 1 baguette – cut into thinnish slices
• extra virgin olive oil
• a few handfuls of grated Gruyere, Emmenthal or Beaufort

Melt the butter in a large heavy-bottomed pan over a low heat and add onions and salt.

Cook over a low heat for THREE HOURS, stirring every 15 minutes or so to ensure it doesn’t stick.

After three hours the onions should be very soft and beautifully caramelised.

Pour in the white wine and vinegar and scrape around to de-glaze the pan.

Add the flour and cook at medium heat for a couple of minutes.

Next add the stock, thyme and brandy and cook at a very gentle simmer for about an hour.

Season to taste.

Drizzle the baguette with olive oil and grill on both sides.

Ladle soup into ovenproof bowls, top with a slice or two of baguette and cover with generous handful of cheese.

Place under a hot grill until molten and bubbling.

Serve immediately with extra slices of cheese on toast.

Verdict: A rich warming soup which is worth the considerable time needed to cook and caramelise the onions. The cheesy bread is equally as important as the soup, so ensure you make extra.

Drink: Finished off the white.

Entertainment: The second part of some Trevor (Luuuuuuuuuke) Eve vehicle on ITV … one of us lost interest a third of the way in.