Although I’ve made pesto many times before, I’ve generally haphazardly chucked the ingredients into the food processor and left it to chance. Despite the results usually being good, I thought it was about time I consulted the mama of authentic Italian home cooking, Marcella Hazan and see if she had an angle on this classic sauce. And indeed she did … double cheeses and butter.

Preparation time: 5 minutes
Cooking time: none
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2
Recipe: ‘The Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking’ by Marcella Hazan

Ingredients

• basil leaves – 50g
• 1 clove of garlic – finely chopped
• pine nuts – 1½ tbsp
• extra virgin olive oil – 4 tbsp
• butter – softened to room temperature – 25g
• parmigiano reggiano – finely grated – 25g
• romano cheese – finely grated – 1tbsp
• coarse sea salt

Quickly soak the basil leaves in water and gently (but thoroughly) pat them dry with kitchen towel.

Put the basil, oil, pine nuts and a good pinch of salt into the food processor and process to a smooth creamy consistency. (If wanted, the pesto can be frozen at this stage.)

Incidentally, have you seen the price of pine nuts these days? They’ve always been costly but struth, pound for pound they are now worth more that life itself.

Transfer to a bowl and thoroughly mix in the two grated cheeses.

Next mix in the softened butter.

Taste and season if necessary.

When serving with pasta, loosen with a spoon or two of the hot pasta water

Dogs can’t look up

Verdict: Once again another excellent recipe from Marcella Hazan – it’s almost as if she knows what she’s talking about – she ought to write a book. A perfect pesto with (unsurprisingly) a buttery finish.

Drink: A variety of 6 for £5 Polish beers.

Entertainment: ‘My Wrongs #8245-8249 And 117‘ on DVD. A very short film directed by Chris Morris about a troubled man referred to as ‘Him’, a talking Doberman called Rothko, a decapitated duck, a kidnapped baby and a Routemaster destined for ‘Shit Off’. 10 minutes of Chris Morris’ warped genius. Watch.

Preparation time: 5 minutes
Cooking time: 25 – 35 minutes
Skill level: easy
Faff level: 1/10
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• 2 large cod fillets (about 250g each) – or other firm white fish – *as already mentioned, we opted for the much cheaper whiting
• 8 tiger prawns – heads removed, cleaned and deveined
• 3 ripe tomatoes
• 1 small red onion – thinly sliced
• 2 cloves of garlic – thinly sliced
• 3 bay leaves
• 1 tin of butter beans – drained and rinsed
• dry white wine – 100ml
• extra virgin olive oil
• S&P

Pre-heat the oven to 200°C (gas mark 6)

Grate the tomatoes (on the course side of the grater) into a bowl and set aside. Discard the skin.

Wash, pat dry and season the fish and prawns. Place in an oven-proof dish and drizzle with olive oil.

Add the onion, bay leaves, garlic, tomato, butter beans and wine. Season again.

Place in the oven and bake for 30 minutes or until the fish is cooked.

Drizzle with some more olive oil and serve with a good bread to soak up the juices.

Verdict: Despite being a very easy one-pot recipe requiring virtually no preparation, this dish rewards with good flavours for very little effort. As a bonus there is plenty of the wine sauce which is yummy mopped up with bread. The inclusion of saffron and a spoonful of aioli* could elevate this from a good Saturday night TV dinner to something you’d be happy to serve up to guests.

Drink: A couple of post-Waitrose pints at The Cat and Canary and the rest of the bottle of white.

Entertainment: The third and final Sherlock Holmes.

* Or as the voice-over kept calling it on Celebrity MasterChef, ‘garlic aioli’

Preparation time: 10 – 15 minutes
Cooking time: 25 – 35 minutes
Skill level: easy
Faff level: 3/10
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• 1 red pepper – cored and cut into 1cm strips
• 1 yellow pepper – cored and cut into 1cm strips
• 1 large onion – thinly sliced
• 3 ripe tomatoes – roughly chopped
• muscovado sugar – 2 tsp
• 1 chilli – finely chopped
• 2 bay leaves
• 3 sprigs thyme – stripped and chopped
• parsley – chopped – 1 tbsp
• coriander – chopped – 1 tbsp (plus more to scatter at the end)
• cumin – ¼ tsp
• saffron strands – ¼ tsp
• smoked paprika – ¼ tsp
• 4 free-range eggs
• olive oil
• water – up to 125ml
• s & p

First find a large deep frying pan or saucepan.

Add a good slug of oil and sauté the onion for two minutes.

Next add the peppers, chilli, sugar, bay leaves, thyme, parsley and coriander, and cook over a high heat for a couple of minutes until the peppers start to soften and intensify in colour.

Add the tomatoes, saffron, paprika, cumin, salt and pepper and cook on low heat for 15 minutes. Stir frequently and add enough water to keep everything loose and moist.

Taste, season, taste, season, etc.

This dish is going to be served in individual pans straight from the hob*, so you need find 2 small frying pans and divide this mixture between each.

Break 2 eggs into each pan (it helps to make indentations in the sauce with the back of a spoon), season, cover and cook over a very low heat for 5 – 10 minutes or until the egg whites have set but the yolk is still soft.

Sprinkle with more coriander and serve up with a few chunks of good bread.

* Obviously you don’t have to do this, you could stick to the one pan and serve up on plates.

Verdict: A sweet gently spiced dish which makes a great weekend brunch treat. The flavourings are only a guide, so experiment with different herbs and spices (riffing around a Middle Eastern theme).

Drink: A strong heavily sugared k4e.

Entertainment: Now that I’ve discovered Yumblog Junior finds my dancing hilarious, the entertainment possibilities are endless.

Preparation time: 30 minutes (plus overnight soaking)
Cooking time: 50 minutes
Skill level: medium
Serves: 2

Ingredients

For the gremolata poached tuna

• 2 tuna steaks
• a good bunch of parsley – finely chopped
• 1 clove of garlic – crushed
• finely grated rind of 1 lemon
• olive oil – 100 ml

For the bean salad

• dried cannellini beans – soaked overnight in cold water – 150g
• green beans – trimmed – 150g
• cherry tomatoes – 125g
• ¼ red onion – finely sliced
• ¼ small fennel bulb – thinly sliced (save fronds for garnish)
• Kalamata olives – pitted and roughly chopped – 30g
• bunch of parsley – roughly chopped
• rocket – handful

For the dressing

• extra-virgin olive oil – 40ml
• white wine vinegar – 1 tbsp
• fennel seeds – toasted – ¼ tsp

Soak the beans overnight, drain, place in a saucepan, cover with water, bring to the boil and cook until tender (40-50 minutes).

Drain and set aside to cool.

(or use tinned beans)

For the gremolata-poached tuna:

Mix together the parsley, garlic and lemon rind in a bowl and season to taste.

Place in a Ziploc® bag and add the tuna steak (obviously as there are 2 steaks you’ll be using 2 bags and dividing the ingredients between each)

Shake to coat evenly with herb mixture, add the olive oil and seal the bag, pressing out any excess air.

Place this inside another Ziploc® bag and seal (hopefully this should give you a good water-tight seal.

Meanwhile, bring a saucepan of water to the boil, remove from the heat and drop in the TunaBags®.

Stand until tuna is cooked through (30 – 40 minutes).

For the dressing:

Combine the ingredients in a bowl and set aside.

For the salad:

Blanch the green beans in boiling water until tender (2-3 minutes), drain, refresh in cold water and drain again.

Place in a bowl with the other salad ingredients. Pour over the dressing and mix together. Season if necessary.

Divide between 2 plates and top with a tuna steak.

Serve with a suggestion of liquid nitrogen.

Verdict: Well the ‘Boil in the Bag’ technique worked. The tuna was moist and cooked through although the lack of any ‘pink’ would be considered over-done by many. Obviously a shorter ‘cooking’ time would sort that out. Overall this was an excellent and filling salad packed with a complex range of aniseed/citrus/peppery olive flavours. Why not order it the next time you’re at ‘The Yummy Duck?

Drink: A temperate Monday evening.

Entertainment: The final episode of ‘Rev’.

Preparation time: 5 minutes
Cooking time: 5 – 30 minutes (depending on whether you roast your own peppers or use tinned)
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• cooked king prawns – 400g (or raw king prawns – peeled, tails intact and veins removed)
• 3 juicy cloves of garlic – thinly sliced
• coarsely chopped rosemary – 1½ tbsp
• extra-virgin olive oil – 30 ml
• 1 red pepper – roasted and cut into 1cm thick slices (or you could use the tinned roasted peppers)
• 1 can of butter beans – drained and rinsed
• the finely grated rind of 1 unwaxed lemon
• the juice of ½ a lemon
• a bunch of watercress or rocket
• s&p
• lemon wedges to serve

Start by roasting and peeling your red pepper in the usual way. If you can’t be bothered to fire up the oven for just one pepper, you can cut it into strips and fry it on the hob. Either way you want the skin to blacken and blister.

Heat the oil in a frying pan and gently cook the garlic and rosemary over a medium heat for a minute or two until the garlic is JUST beginning to colour.

Add the cooked prawns*, beans, pepper and lemon rind and cook for 2-3 minutes until heated through.

Add the lemon juice and watercress/rocket and toss everything together.

Taste, season, remove from the heat and serve immediately with a wedge of lemon.

*If you are using raw prawns fry them on their own for 3 minutes or until they change colour and are just cooked … and then add the other ingredients.

Life goes on … Sunday lunch at The Market Porter

Verdict: Deeeeeeeeeeeelish. Fast and tasty and lush. We used 1 tbsp of rosemary and the flavour was very subtle … which is why I suggest using 1½ (or even 2) tbsp.

Drink: Friday night … so a few Belgian beers and a bottle of white.

Entertainment: ‘Celebrity Masterchef’ and ‘The IT Crowd’ – we saw that Matt Berry in The Market Porter yesterday afternoon.

If your griddled halloumi doesn’t adhere to these rules, throw it away and start again.

Preparation time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 25 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• 2 aubergines – cut into 2cm cubes
• extra virgin olive oil – 3 tbsp
• 410g can of chick peas – rinsed and drained (or soak and cook dried chick peas)
• 1 lemon – peel and pith removed – roughly chopped
• 1 clove of garlic – crushed
• tahini – 1 tbsp
• fresh mint – a generous handful – shredded
• halloumi – 250g pack – cut into 8 slices
• rocket – 100g

Mix together the aubergine cubes and olive oil, season and place in a large non-stick frying pan.

Cook over a medium heat for 15 – 25 minutes or until the aubergine is soft and light brown.

Set aside to cool.

Meanwhile put the chick peas in a large bowl and gently crush with a potato masher.

Add the lemon (including juice), tahini, garlic, mint, seasoning and mix together.

Add the cooled cooked aubergine and combine all the ingredients.

Next place a griddle over a medium heat and dry fry the halloumi for a minute or two on each side. (If it doesn’t look like the diagram, throw away and start again)

To serve, place some rocket on the plate, spoon over the aubergine salad and top with the halloumi. Garnish with a few mint leaves.

Verdict: A quick, easy, tasty and healthy midweek meal which could become a regular on the menu here at Yumblog Towers… be generous with the mint.

Drink: A bottle of red.

Entertainment: ‘Celebrity Masterchef’, week 2. Mark Little is charming. Danielle ‘I shag footballers for a living‘ Lloyd isn’t.

Don’t be fooled by that innocent face.

Preparation time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 30 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2

Ingredients

• Paccheri – 200g
• 1 red pepper – seeds removed – thickly sliced
• 1 yellow pepper – seeds removed – thickly sliced
• Kalamata olives – pitted and crushed – 40g
• 2 cloves of garlic – crushed
• fresh marjoram or oregano leaves – 1tbsp
• capers – 1tbsp
• red wine vinegar – 1½ tbsp
• olive oil – 50ml
• s&p
• plus shaved Parmesan to serve

Preheat oven to as hot as it will go.

Put the peppers, olives, oil, garlic, marjoram/oregano, capers and vinegar in a roasting pan, toss to combine and season to taste.

Roast, stirring occasionally, until the peppers are tender and starting to caramelise (20-25 minutes).

Meanwhile, cook pasta in a large saucepan of boiling water until al dente (10-12 minutes).

Drain and add to the pepper mixture. Combine everything together.

Serve immediately with shavings of Parmesan.

Verdict: A delicious sweet and piquant sauce which perfectly compliments this particular brand of pasta. There is something about Paccheri which sets it above other pasta shapes… I suspect it would be tasty even if served topped with a steaming coil of doggy doo… however, that’s a theory I’ve yet put to the test, so until then best stick to the roasted peppers.

Drink: Micro bottles of (sp)Asda* French beer

Entertainment: Celebrity MasterChef. Imagine our delight when Gregg said he loved “the BIG flavours of Dick“.

* Sorry, but (sp)Asda were doing a special on Pampers – it seems our anti-Walmart principles are as throw-away as the disposable nappies we now shamefully use.

The third in this occasional series and the third taken from ‘The Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking‘ by Marcella Hazan. The marketing department here at Yumblog (Yumedia Communications) believe this to be the most comprehensive, authentic and definitive cookbook on the subject, so if you like Italian food (and who doesn’t) you should really consider investing a mere £16 and adding this weighty volume to your library.

Preparation time: 5 minutes
Cooking time: 46 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2
Recipe: ‘The Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking’ by Marcella Hazan

Ingredients

• 1 tin of chopped tomatoes
• onion – finely chopped – 3 tbsp
• carrot – finely chopped – 3 tbsp
• celery – finely chopped – 3 tbsp
• butter – 85g
• double cream – 100ml
• sea salt

Put all the ingredients except for the double cream into a frying pan and cook uncovered at the merest simmer for 45 minutes. Remember to stir from time to time.

Turn up the heat slightly to increase the simmer, stir in the double cream and adjust seasoning.

Cook for a minute, stirring continuously.

Serve with pasta and parmigiano-reggiano.

Verdict: As always with these pasta sauces, the slow cooking of the tomatoes produces a rich and sweet sauce with a great depth of flavour. Despite the long cooking time, the vegetables retained a pleasing crunchiness. A tomatoey creamy delight.

Drink: A fruity French red.

Entertainment: A dip into various Graham Linehan-written comedy box sets.

Paxton the Pig: Scroll down and read the review from James Rose … such a warm, expressive Grandfather.

Preparation time: 10 – 15 minutes
Cooking time: 30 – 45 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 2 as a main course or 4 as a starter

Ingredients

• risotto rice – 200g
• butternut squash – peeled and cut into 1cm (25 pixel) cubes – 150g
• tomato essence – 300ml
• 1 small courgette – cut into 1cm cubes
• ½ fennel – thinly sliced
• ½ onion – finely chopped
• 10 cherry tomatoes – halved
• frozen peas – 80g
• mascarpone cheese – 2 tbsp
• ½ garlic clove – crushed
• water – 300ml
• coriander seeds – lightly crushed – ½ tsp
• freshly grated parmesan cheese – 4 tsp (plus extra for sprinkling)
• olive oil
• s & p

Preheat the oven to 200C/Gas 6.

Heat some oil in a frying pan and gently fry the onions for 3-4 minutes until tender. Add the garlic and fry for a further minute.

Next add the rice, giving it a good stir to coat it thoroughly in the oil, and fry for 1-2 minutes until translucent. season with salt and a grinding of black pepper.

Add the squash and fennel and mix well.

Add the water and half the tomato essence (150ml) and bring to a gentle simmer. Cover with a lid and cook for 15 minutes.

Place the remaining tomato essence into a saucepan and warm through.

Meanwhile, place the halved cherry tomatoes onto a baking tray, drizzle with a little olive oil and season with salt and freshly ground black pepper. Roast in the oven for 5-10 minutes, or until the tomatoes are just tender and starting to collapse.

After the 15 minutes of cooking the rice should have absorbed all of the liquid. Remove the lid and stir well.

Add the courgettes and coriander seeds and cook for a couple of minutes.

Add the peas, mascarpone and parmesan and stir well, adding a little extra tomato essence if the risotto is too dry.

Cook briefly for a minute or two until the courgettes are just tender.

Spoon the risotto into a small serving bowl and top with a few roasted tomatoes and a sprinkling of parmesan.

Spoon over the warmed tomato essence.

(Raymond likes to finish off his risotto with a flourish of micro leaves – do the same if you know what they are and where to find them)

Serve.

Verdict: Pretty darn good and (once you’ve made your tomato essence) a quick and easy meal to make. Light, refreshing and tomatoey.

Drink: I’d go for a cold and crisp bottle of white.

Entertainment: ‘Burn After Reading’ on DVD. LoveFilm discribed this as a ‘brilliantly clever and endlessly entertaining movie which critics are calling smart, funny, and original’. Yumblog described it as a film which ‘wasn’t so bad we couldn’t watch it to the end’ and gave it a 2 stars rating of ‘average’.

Here’s the story, of a man named Brady, who was busy with three boys of his own.
They were four men, living all together, yet they were all alone.

Till the one day when the lady met this fellow, and they knew that it was much more than a hunch. That this group would somehow form a family. That’s the way we all became the Brady Bunch. The Brady Bunch. The Brady Bunch.

That’s the way we became the Brady Bunch.

Preparation time: 10 – 15 minutes
Cooking time: 40 – 50 minutes
Skill level: Easy
Serves: 4

Ingredients

For the soup

• cannellini beans – 400g can – drained
• 1 onion – chopped
• 1 leek – diced
• 2 carrots – peeled and cut to a small dice
• 2 courgettes – cut to a small dice
• 2 medium-sized potatoes – peeled and cut to a small dice
• 1 celery stick, chopped
• green beans – topped, tailed and cut into 3-4 small pieces – 100g
• fresh or frozen peas – 100g
• 1 tin of tomatoes – 400g
• small pasta shapes or spaghettini, broken into small pieces – 75g
• 1 bouquet garni of bay leaves, thyme and parsley stalks
• 1 garlic clove, finely chopped
• olive oil
• s & p

For the pistou

• fresh basil leaves – a healthy bunch
• 4 big fat cloves of garlic
• 2 decent tomatoes – skinned, de-seeded and chopped
• parmesan cheese – grated – 75g
• olive oil – 150ml

Heat a generous slug of oil in large saucepan over a medium heat, add the onion, leeks and garlic and sauté for 5 minutes.

Next add all the other ingredients except the pasta, cover with water, season and simmer till the vegetables are tender.

Add the pasta and simmer till cooked. Adding extra water if the soup is too thick.

Meanwhile, for the pistou, blend the basil, garlic, tomato and cheese together in a food processor. Gradually add olive oil to make a pesto-like mixture.

Taste and season.

When the soup is cooked, taste and adjust the seasoning.

Serve with a good spoonful of pistou.

Verdict: Less of a soup, more of a hearty meal. The pistou is a lighter (and tastier) version of pesto and can of course be used on its own as a very delicious pasta sauce.

Drink: A beer or two.

Entertainment: ‘Masterchef’ followed by ‘The Shield’, season 7, episodes 7 & 8. Gregg and John ditch the nervous twitchy mental unemployed one and Vic comes up with more cunning plans than Baldrick.