Preparation time: 10 minutes plus 2 days to cure
Cooking time: none
Skill level: easy
Serves: 4

Ingredients

• 2 fresh salmon fillets (skin on) – 400g
• 2 medium sized raw beetroots – grated
• course sea salt – 40g
• caster sugar – 40g
• fresh dill finely chopped – small bunch
• horseradish sauce – 75g

Place the salmon skin side down on a piece of clingfilm.

Mix together all the other ingredients and rub this mixture onto the fish.

Sandwich with the other fillet, skin side up.

Tightly wrap in the 3-4 layers of clingfilm.

Lay in a shallow dish (there will be some leakage), put a saucer/small tray/tin lid/etc. on top and weigh down with something heavyish (Bible/bowling ball/etc.)

Place in the fridge for 2-3 days, turning every 12 hours so the briny cure liquid thoroughly permeates the fish.

Unwrap, slice thinnish and enjoy with some horseradish sauce.

Gravalax will keep in the fridge for around 5 days.

Verdict: Although all three gravali were excellent, this beetroot option clearly stood out as the best. Sweet, beetrooty and bright pink.

Drink: Some sparkling, some red, some white and some dessert.

Entertainment: Listening to the ramblings of Mad Auntie T

This year Santa delivered Yumblog Junior a little extra Christmas treat – Chicken Pox.

Preparation time: 10 minutes plus 2 days to cure
Cooking time: none
Skill level: ridiculously easy
Serves: 4

Ingredients

• 2 fresh salmon fillets (skin on) – 400g
• caster sugar – 40g
• coarse sea salt – 40g
• 1 star anise – seeds removed and crushed
• coriander seeds – crushed – 2tsp
• fresh coriander – a few stalks – roughly chopped
• fresh ginger – roughly chopped – 1cm piece
• mirin (or dry sherry) – 1tbsp

Place one piece of salmon skin side down on a piece of clingfilm.

Mix together all the other ingredients and rub this mixture onto the fish.

Place the other piece of fish on top, skin side up.

Tightly wrap in 3-4 layers of clingfilm.

Lay in a shallow dish (there will be some leakage), put a saucer/small tray/tin lid/etc. on top and weigh down with something heavyish.

Place in the fridge for 2-3 days, turning every 12 hours so the briny cure liquid permeates throughout the fish.

Unwrap, slice thinnish and enjoy with some thin strips of cucumber and a horseradish sauce.

Gravalax will keep in the fridge for around 5 days.

Verdict: Spicier (obviously) than gravalax #1. Tasty.

Drink: A shot or two of iced Vodka.

Entertainment: We had a guest, so technically we were the entertainment.

Box of shame

Preparation time: 1 minute
Cooking time: 3 minutes
Skill level: few things in life are easier than nogging an egg

Ingredients

• 2 (fresh and free range) egg yolks
• sugar – 2 tbsp
• milk – warmed – 2 mugs/glasses worth
• brandy – 80ml

Mix together the egg yolk and sugar and divide between two mugs/glasses.

Pour over the warm milk and stir.

Add a generous shot (40ml) of brandy to each.

Serve and cheers.

Verdict: Definitely one of the tastiest of the Christmastide tipples. A boozy dairy dessert in a glass.

Food: A splendid tomato, onion and Stilton tart.

Entertainment: Christmas with Raymond Blanc in October.

Preparation time: 1 minute
Cooking time: 3 minutes
Skill level: easier than making a cup of tea.

Ingredients

• Kirsch – 100ml
• juice of 2 lemons
• finest Yorkshire tap water – 500ml
• honey – 2 tsp

Put water, lemon juice and honey in a saucepan and bring to the boil.

Add the Kirsch and keep on a low heat until ready to serve.

Serve.

Verdict: Boozy Lemsip.

Food: Accompanied by baked polenta and roasted vegetables.

Entertainment:‘MasterChef – The Pros’. The final. Congratulations to Ash.

Preparation time: 1 minute
Cooking time: 10 minutes
Skill level: slightly more skill required than for making Glogg, because you have to peel a satsuma.

Ingredients

• Pimms – 250ml
• Brandy – 100ml
• apple juice – 500ml
• ground ginger – 2 tsp
• 1 satsuma – segmented
• dried apple slices – handful

Put all the ingredients in a saucepan and simmer gently for 10 minutes.

Pour.

Drink.

Verdict: A nice boozy gingery warming drink. Like a hug in a mug. But not like cup-a-soup.

Food: Accompanied a very tasty gravalax…recipe to follow.

Entertainment: The penultimate episode of ‘MasterChef – The Pros’. Ash is the obvious winner.

Preparation time: 1 minute
Cooking time: 5 minutes plus 15 minutes infusion time
Skill level: If you can manage to open a bottle of wine, you can make glogg

Ingredients

• 1 bottle of sub £5.00 red plonk – 750ml
• 6 cloves
• fresh ginger – sliced – 70g
• 10 cardamon pods – halved
• caster sugar – 85g
• dried apple slices* – handful
• 2 cinnamon sticks (very much optional at Yumblog Cottage)
• brandy – 40ml
• plus some flaked almonds and raisins to serve

Pour the wine into a saucepan and add all the other ingredients (apart from the brandy).

Heat and simmer gently for 5 minutes.

Turn off the heat, cover and allow to infuse for 15 minutes.

Add the brandy and serve with a few flaked almonds and raisins in the glass

Verdict: An excellent (and more potent) alternative to mulled wine. Ours didn’t taste much of cardamon, but that could have been because our pods were bought sometime in the last millennium.

Food: We had ours as a precursor to Raclette.

Entertainment: An accidental second viewing of ‘Surrogates’ on DVD. We spent the first hour trying to decide whether it’s familiarity was due to a previous viewing or the cliché-ridden storyline. Turned out to be both.

* Completely optional – we happened to have recently bought an unexpectedly expensive packet of the stuff at a Berlin Christmas market and wanted to use some before it got as old and stale as the cardamon pods. That said, once re-hydrated in booze, these apple slices made a very agreeable nibble.

Unpleasant food photograph of the week: ‘Snowflake Cake (with pubic hair decoration)’, GoodFood, 101 Christmas Dishes.

Preparation time: 2 hours
Cooking time: 10 minutes
Skill level: easy
Serves: 6
Recipe: David Myers and Simon King aka The Hairy Bikers

Ingredients

• double cream – 500ml
• caster sugar – 4 tbsp
• 3½ gelatine sheets
• raisins – 2 tbsp
• dark rum – 2 tbsp
• ground ginger – ¼ tsp
• ground allspice – ¼ tsp
• ground nutmeg – to taste
• 1 small handful berries, such as redcurrants, to serve

Place the raisins into a small bowl and cover with the rum. Set aside to soak for at least 30 minutes.

Meanwhile, soak the gelatine sheets in a bowl of cold water until softened. Drain and squeeze out any excess liquid using your hands.

In a heavy-based pan, heat the double cream, sugar and ground spices. Bring to the boil, then reduce the heat until the mixture is simmering and simmer for 2-3 minutes, whisking until the sugar has dissolved.

Remove the cream mixture from the heat and whisk in the drained gelatine until dissolved. Drain the raisins and stir into the cream mixture (discard the soaking liquid).

Spoon the mixture into six moulds or ramekins. Set aside to cool completely, then cover with cling film and chill in the fridge for at least two hours, or until set.

To serve, dip the ramekins briefly into hot water to loosen each panna cotta and turn out onto serving plates. Scatter over some redcurrants to garnish.

Verdict: As we were at our Christmas residence in Berlin there were no ramekins, so a single bowl had to be employed; it took a little longer to extricate the Cotta from this receptacle but nonetheless it popped out in the end. The dessert was well set and super rich. The suggested portions are undoubtedly correct so if you see what you deem to be a small portion in front of you, fear not, you will be sated. The spices with the rum and the raisins give it the flavour of a delightfully creamy Christmas pudding, though obviously there needn’t be any seasonal constraints on its consumption

Drink: Don’t forget to knock back the raisin infused rum.

Entertainment: The Bickering of the Sisters, an occasional event that is literally not a joy to behold, even for the participants, doesn’t even require the fuel of alcohol, but the presence of a parent is usually sufficient as a catalyst.

So pick up a copy today and see how your Christmas could have been.

* Mustard and Cress – Press